Updated: Nov 20, 2019
Once the speed dating is over, what happens next?
So, you have had a fun, successful night of speed dating. You have met some new and interesting people and made some friends along the way...... what happens now?
The speed dating venues in Birmingham and Solihull are open until late, so feel free to stay after the event and mix and mingle with who you have met and maybe exchange phone numbers at this point if you feel comfortable to do so, but don't be pushy. If someone likes you they will have ticked the box to say so, so keep the conversation casual.
The day after the event you will be sent your matches via email. To recap a 'love' match is where both parties ticked yes that you like each other. A 'friend' match means you want to stay in touch - maybe see where that leads. If either party tick 'no' then no details will be exchanged.
So, once you receive your email, one of you needs to make the first move...... who will be the bravest and jump in? :-) In this day and age it really doesn't matter who messages first - but the relationship will go nowhere if neither of you does - so go for it, message them and say hi and how nice it was to meet them. After all, it's why you both ticket yes, right?
Arrange the first date sooner rather than later - you don't want him/her to think you have gone off them so strike while the iron is hot!
Where to go on a first date
After some initial small talk, it's time to make plans for your first date. This could be meeting for coffee (especially useful for a 'friends' match to get to know each other better), dinner, cocktails, mini-golf, Digbeth Dining Club, Dance Club, play pool. rock climbing...... the list is endless but keep it simple. An elegant dinner sounds lovely, but do you really want to be worrying about which knife and fork to use instead of getting to know your date? In fact, we would recommend anything except the cinema - after all, you can't get to know each other sitting in silence!
What to talk about on a first date
Whilst you want your sparkling personality to shine through, there are some conversation clangers to avoid. You want to paint a nice picture of yourself, but bragging is a no-no, along with talking about an
ex-partner and all the other dates you have lined up. Politics should be avoided - especial the dreaded B word we have all come to love to hate.
Body Language on a First Date
Whilst conversation is obviously important, think about your body language as well. Making eye contact, smiling, a light touch of someone's hand and putting your phone away - all make for a great first impression that you like the other person and are interested in them.
When To Plan The Second Date
If on your first date you get the impression that you both like each other, bite the bullet and arrange a second date then and there. For example, if your date mentions an activity they enjoy, ask them to join you in a few day's time to do that activity.
Follow Up Conversation
If the date has gone well and you would like to see them again, tell them - send a quick text or phone call to say how much you enjoyed their company.
Ultimately, a successful first date is one where you feel comfortable and confident. First dates should not be a big deal. They’re supposed to be a fun and casual meeting with someone you’re interested in getting to know. We have recommended these first date tips to help you create this environment, but try not to overthink it. Stay calm, be yourself and enjoy the date!
“You don't love someone because they're perfect, you love them in spite of the fact that they're not.” ― Jodi Picoult, My Sister's Keeper